My Worst Fears

My Worst Fears

We are in big
trouble
super-sized storms
exploding nukes
crazy Washington
contemptible NATO

bad water
computers, robotics,
automation
jobs lost
to the
integrated circuits

Worried about
future generations
and our
non-human relations
on this
fragile planet

Grew up
hiding under
school desk

Cuban missile crisis
never went away
comes back like a
bad dream

Grew up
ducking from
flying combat boots
and smacks on head
and ass
head thrown
against closet door

Grew up
doubting
myself
the voice was so harsh
("If you had a brain you'd be dangerous.  You're a dumb ass.  Dig your head outta your ass!")

What weight
was he caring around
that was taken out
on me?

Grew up
trying to prove
myself
to others
and to me

Grew up
worried about abandonment
from father
mother
step-father
relatives
friends

Grew up
lucky,
if luck
truly exists,
found a life raft
a way
to live
care
and share
the values
that deep down
were not beaten
out of me
in spite of
my worst fears

Bruce

* Art work by Will Park from Central Florida and poem inspired by recent house guest from New York City poet Dan Icolari who challenged me to write it.